I wonder, is most of our suffering related to either the feeling of not being loved or the fear of losing love? For example, many high achievers would admit that they were driven by expectations. So, do we work very hard to fulfill these expectations from parents, teachers, partners and friends out of the fear that they may not love us if we do not? Thus, is our achievement or success standing on very flimsy ground? What if we stop achieving?
Then, there are those of us who feel like "failures", because we have not achieved (in the traditional, worldly sense). There may have been incomplete education, career-related problems or unsuccessful relationships. Is this sense of failure tied to not being loved and regarded as someone important?
What if we felt loved and important and successful, irrespective of how we performed at school or work ? What if we could pour all that hard work into nurturing our beautiful relationships?
I believe that if parents, teachers and all mentors were to do this, then the future generations would be fulfilled enough to not only achieve their full potential at school or work, but be brimming with the capacity to pour love into their new relationships. This cycle would continue and make humankind a happy species....
Sujata V, Ph.D, MFT
Always Learning..through the good AND not-so-good times!